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Well we should test that on my dick ;););) y/n?

Vale you do not have a dick and even if you did I ain’t sucking no dick while I have the hiccups

blaineyandersons:

i love being at disney world when it rains because the weak will leave and the strong will have five minute wait times

(Source: theshinydratini)

woah girl you’re going to have men queueing up if you use those words carelessly

I am only good at sucking things that people don’t want sucked. Like the fun out of situations. And the talent out of myself. And the love out of my friends. 

ouch, was it on?

Yes

If you keep sucking air in the hiccups won’t stop

I am only capable of sucking

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I believe that
your soul

and
my soul

are
very

old friends.

Mandeq Ahmed, “Mates” (via dominicjohndiglio)

I just spilled a full glass of water on my laptop

u gotta be soooo careful with joke ships they suddenly turn into your very lifeblood
sniper-bird

It seems I have learned this the hard way